SOFTWARE LICENCE AGREEMENT



  BREAKING THE SEAL on this envelope constitutes acceptance and joyfull

  agreement to the terms and provisions of this licence agreement and

  you rejoice to be bound by said provisions, and assimilated into the

  ranks of obedient, cooperative and paying supporters of Mega-Suss.



  IMPORTANT: This is important. It cost us a heap of cash to have it

  written, and you'd better read it, or else. Read it right now too, you

  insignificant peon, or you'll be sorry. Especially DON'T just rip the

  flap open without paying any attention to this very important message.

  We'll know if you do! You'll grow warts.



  LICENCE: This Licence Agreement has capital letters, and is effective

  upon your removal or breaking of the disclaimer seal on the Program

  Diskettes, or our achievement of total monopoly, whichever is earlier.

  It shall continue until terminated, as may be allowed by Mega-Suss.



  AGREEMENT: You acknowledge and agree that we own multitudes of lawyers,

  and that you would be mad to consider, perform or aid actions that said

  laywers might deem injurious to the Mega-Suss plan for world domination.



  DIRECTIONS: You agree to obey to the best of your abilities all and any

  directions given you by designated representatives of Mega-Suss in repect

  of this software or other matters that may arise.



  REMEDIES: Failure to comply fully and promptly with such directions shall

  be deemed a breach of contract, and will also void your rights to retain

  or use the product. You will in addition incur a severe and strict penalty,

  the nature and duration of which shall be determined at the disgression

  of Mega-Suss or its representatives.



  LICENCE FEES: The licence fees unpaid by you are in consideration of

  your continued solvency. But it doesn't matter, because soon we'll

  know what you have, and just deduct the fees from your bank account.

  Please run the included easy to use networking software and log onto

  our server for further details. The first thirty minutes are free.



  COPYRIGHT: This software is ours, all ours. You just paid hundreds

  of dollars for the blank diskettes and this excellent paper bag.

  You agree to think yourself lucky that we'll generously let you make

  one backup copy, and actually run our precious code on your lousy

  computer. There are no bugs in this perfect code, so don't pester

  us with your stupid misunderstandings and pathetic complaints.



  COSTS OF LITIGATION. These are to be taken as an indication of the

  extreme folly of all parties' overdependence on legal contrivances.



  GOVERNMENT LICENCEE: Hi Senator. Don't forget who helped you out.

  Any other problems, just call us. Oh, and the bag will be ready

  for you on Tuesday as usual.



  LANGUAGE SOFTWARE: If this is one of our language products (how should

  we know) then you agree to have our copyright message plastered all

  through your object code. Don't expect us to tell you how to avoid this.



  RESTRICTIONS: You may not use, copy, modify, or transfer the Software,

  without first offering sacrifice at the altar of Mega-Suss. You may not

  decompile, disassemble, or in any way poke around in the guts of the

  Software. If you so much as look at the executables in hex format, you

  will go blind. We should know.



  ADDITIONAL RESTRICTIONS: See all those uniformed thugs over there?

  Good. So don't get any funny ideas now. You don't want to make us

  angry, do you? See you next upgrade.



  LIMITED LIABILITY: This software is provided "as is", whatever that is.

  You understand it's very complicated, far beyond your comprehension,

  so how should we know what will happen when you use it wrong.

  There may even be some risk involved, but that's your problem.

  Why, even we have trouble with it on bad days.



  GOVERNING LAW: This License Agreement shall be construed and governed

  in accordance with the laws of the State of Insanity. It may not be

  enforcible in some states, such as those where slavery is illegal.

  In these cases, Mega-Suss reserves the option to transport you to a

  location or realm where this agreement can be enforced.







  Guy Dunphy       30 July 1997

  You have won $10,000,000 (Some conditions apply).